If you're not on the list you're not coming in

Normally I'm very much against this kind of tomfoolery but as it's my cousin's little Jack Russel guard dog Boo and we were having an awesome Sunday roast lunch in their garden i'll let it slide, just this once. This post is dedicated to my late Mum who loved Jack Russels and who's birthday would have been this week. We raised a glass and remembered her and all the good times we had with her. She would have laughed at seeing Boo in this t-shirt.

"Back to the office for tea and medals"

A day out fishing with Swellbow proved a good test for my new AGG recycled drinks can stove. £10 and 10 grams of alcohol fuelled brew warming goodness saved our asses as Swellbow forgot to bring a flask of tea. The inclement weather was no bother for this little fire breather. It took just an ounce of meths to get two brews going. I don't know if it'll replace the Crux when I'm 30km into the mountains of Norway but for low level camping here in the UK it'll do just fine.

The Holy Grail?

It's arrived. The mug. The chalice. Several grams worth of double walled titanium extravagance. It's light, the handles fold, my water bottles fit snugly inside and it keeps my brew warm. Yes, it's green but not that green. You see, and i'm guessing a bit here, it's probably constructed of cheap (relatively) and plentiful Russian titanium, fabricated in Japan (it says Japan on the side), shipped to America where it sat on fleaBay waiting for me to order it and have it shipped to Blighty. In a little over 5 weeks it will leave with us for our new life in Norway, only a couple of hundred miles from the Russian border. And it managed this circumnavigational feat for a smidge over £20. I dread to think of it's carbon footprint. But isn't it pretty!

All systems go!

We are go! Go! Go! My girlfriend got the job in Bergen, Norway and we're taking this opportunity to try living somewhere completely different. I love Norway, I think I'm more excited than her about this. Things are only just settling in about how much work it will be to get organised to move lock stock and both effing barrels but it'll be so worth it. Obviously I'll have to learn the language but thankfully I've found a great way to learn Norwegian. Bergen is surround by mountains and there will be snow in the winter. I cannae wait!

Change of scenery?

Could we be in for a serious change of scenery? Could we be off to live in Norway permanently? Will i have to look into buying a really warn sleeping bag and a pair of Icebugs? Fingers crossed. We await the phone call...

Is breast best?

My work colleauge brought her wee baby boy into work today and dumped Dylan on my lap while she had a chat to our manager. She also dumped his Tommy Tipee mug on my desk, right next to my Camelback bottle. The similarites were uncanny. I remembered someone saying that they didn't use Camelback drinking systems anymore as he'd "Grown out of sucking my Ma's teat years ago". I say, who are we to argue with nature. Breast is most definately best.

...a little patience, yeah, yeah...

Just got back from the doctors. Got to see a different GP this time, a young guy who does a lot of running so actually had a good conversation about my ankle, flexibility, pronation, physiotherapy, etc. Thinks everything is healing up fine. Still going to take time to heal properly but i've got my physiotherapy to do (gotta keep doing my ABC's), i can start doing some more no-impact exercising and he recommended i got some new running shoes for when i can start running again (mine are old and battered). I'm very impatient when i'm recovering from injury. I remember when i had my reconstruction surgery after destroying my knee. It drove me nuts just sitting around, playing hour after hour of Pro Evo and Medal of Honour. Must learn to be more patient. Actually, being more patient would have stopped me being injured in the first place!

Customer Service isn't dead

Arrived in the post this morning, just three days after sending my broken one back to the UK importers, one shiny new Gerber Suspension multi-tool. Good work fellas!

It's a mere flesh wound

I'm still crook. My ankle isn't healing up properly so i'm going back to see the doctor on Wednesday. I knew this would happen. I'd hoped it was just going to be a slight ligament strain but somethings not right. Time to cut through the usual NHS bullshit and tell them what I want to happen i.e. get it scanned and get straight into physio because i don't want to spend another summer sitting around watching crap on tv because i'm too crook to go out and do interesting things. I don't want to be indoors anymore. There is only so much surfing on the internet (actually, there is a LOT) that one person can do before they're forced to take a break and watch some TV. Then within minutes of watching TV you wish you were back on the internet. At least with the internet you can control what you watch. Reminds me of something PTC* said in his blog - "If I don’t flip channels during adverts it’s becoming increasingly difficult for me not to leap from the chair and smash the television to pieces."
I know exactly how he feels today.

"You're not a man 'til you've pulled a tooth out with a pair of pliers."

Finally made it outside the flat. Went to work yesterday and spent most of the time ploughing through two weeks of pointless e-mails. Got a phone call from my friend Pete who said he was going walking along the South West Coastal Path over the weekend and wanted to know if I would join him. Sorely tempted but i want to get my ankle up to strength slowly so I had to decline. We ordered pizza last night (couldn't be bothered to cook for once) and drank a couple of lonely Tiger beers from the fridge whilst watching Deadliest Catch. Today's post title was uttered by Phil Harris, captain of the crabbing boat Cornelia Marie whilst out on the Bering Sea. Don't know why this programme is so compelling but I love it. Maybe it's because I can't believe what some people do for a living, in such a hideous environment. Puts everything into perspective when someone in my office complains about the air conditioning. Pah! Sack up! Maybe I'm just in awe at the power of nature in some of the more remote parts of the planet. Anyway, it was good to get a quick dose of an interesting TV programme before the pish of Idiots in a House grips an Idiot Nation for the rest of the summer. This morning a new, ultra light and very cheap summer sleeping bag and a frivolous titanium gadget turned up in the post. Wish i was going camping! It doesn't have to be anywhere dramatic or adventurous today, I'd be just as happy if it was down to the caves with my friends (one of last summer's outings pictured above). Good times.

A good 'pizza' advive

Thinking of making home made pizza tonight. It got me thinking about the pizza oven we made last summer whilst camping on the coast. The stone work was trial and error but we made it work in the end. The fire below was reluctant to get going so Mini Hoff had the great idea of using a battery operated inflatable mattress pump to give it a 'kick start'. It worked a bloody treat. The whole operation was slightly more succesful than trying to catch fish off a sixty foot cliff. Looking forward to camping down there again soon.

I'm in love

See what happens when i'm left to my own devices? Off work and with the internet at my disposal i fell in love. Words can't descibe the feeling of lust. One day i will posses this intoxicating creature. Worst of all, it won't make me a better person or fullfil me spiritually. Ladies and gentlemen, i give you the Snowpeak Titanium mug, in green of course. It'll keep my brew warm, thats how i'll justify it to myself.

Norway! Yes Way!

There is one other Norway based joke I use way too often, the one about wondering how i can a-fjord it. This was my second trip to Norway. The first time me and my girlfriend went we visited some friends of her's on the east coast in Bergen where the surrounding scenery is imposing, picture postcard Norway with towering mountains and deep fjords. This time we stayed at her mum's hytte (log cabin) in the flatter, greener farming area outside Oslo. The weather was amazing most of the time we were there, with the hire Golf's dashboard blinking 28C on the way back to the airport. As i'd tweaked my ankle before we left we didn't get to go out walking in the wilds at all so i spent some of my time helping tear down a panelled stud wall in the hytte and some of the time driving out through the wilderness, scoping the place out for a return trip in the summer when we'll wild camp in the Rondane National Park, a five hour drive from the hytte. All of the time though i was scoffing ibuprofen in an attempt to heal my ankle which really just needed ice and rest. I'm looking forward to going back. The river water is clear, cold and sweet. The backdrop is jaw dropping snow capped mountains... and you're MILES from anywhere.

It started with The Beano

What do you do when you're off work because of illness or injury? When I was a kid and I used to have a day off school sick my Nan used to go round to the paper shop and bring me back a Beano comic or maybe even Victor (Anyone remember Joe Bones the Human Fly or Hammer Man?). I used to sit there, on the sofa made up like a bed, and watch three TV channels and read my Beano or Victor. Over the years this tradition developed from The Beano to fishing magazines, bike magazines, four TV channels, Sinclair Spectrum, VHS videos, heavy metal magazines, Nintendo, more bike magazines, Playstation, more TV stations, Playstaion 2, DVDs, Xbox and now the internet with it's mahoosive choice of subject matter and near instantaneous access. So lying here, my ankle on ice after tweaking it running over the local heath, laptop in my, well, lap obviously and dosed up on ibuprofen I decided to start this blog. Not sure why, somewhere to vent maybe, somewhere to share or just something to do. We'll see, it'll evolve over time no doubt.